Funny SMS

Raju: main apni patni ko kya gift doon? Pappu: Diamond ring de. Raju: nahi main kuch bada dena chahata hoon. Pappu: fir tractor ka tyre de!
Pappu: tumne apni patni ko birthday par diamond ring kyun di? Voh to car chahati thi na? Raju: par main nakli car kahan se le ke aata?
Ek police inspector ke ghar chori ho rahi thi. Wife: utho, ghar me chori ho rahi hai. Inspector: mujhe sone de, iss time duty par nahi hoon.
Raju ek sadhu se bola: baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao. Sadhu: beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?
Doctor: tum roz subah bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyun ghoorte ho? Raju: ji, bahar likha hai: auraton ko dekhne ka samay 9am - 11am hai.
Husband: agar tumhe kuch ho gaya to main pagal ho jaaunga. Wife: doosri shaadi to nahin karoge? Husband: pagal to kuch bhi kar sakta hai.
Raju: Vo ladki mujhe ke muskura rahi hai. Pappu: yeh to kuchh bhi nahi, jab maine pehli baar tunhe dekha tha to 3 din hassi nahi rok paya
Raju: main purse ghar bhool aaya, mujhe 1000 rupaye chahiye. Bania: bilkul dost, Yeh lo 10 rupaye riksha karle ghar se le aao
Bania market gaya underwear lene. Bania: yeh kitne ka hai? Shopkeeper: rs 500. Bania: arey daily wear dikhaao, party wear nahin.
1 machchar chinese ke sir pe aa baitha. Vo us ko pakad ke kha gaya. Fir 1 baniye pe ja baitha. Usne pakad ke chinese ko poochha- khareedoge?