SMS > One liners
Money can\'t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
You\'re never too old to learn something stupid.
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
If at first you don\'t succeed, skydiving is not for you!
If winning isn\'t everything why do they keep score?
A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.