SMS > One liners
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.
After d divorce d girl won\'t live with mom-dad coz they beat her. She wants 2 live with d Indian cricket team coz they never beat nybdy!
Y don\'t grasshoppers go 2 baseball games? Coz they prefer cricket.
If everything seems to be going well then u have obviously overlooked something.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don\'t have film.
If you mention how nice she looks, it\'s sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it\'s male indifference.
My secretary quit. She caught me kissing my wife.
New year vacation is time off to remind employees that the business can get along without them.
On a woman\'s tombstone: I may have been a Miss, but I haven\'t missed much